Mood: heavy

It's been awhile since I last updated. Let me do this catching up kinda quick.

Okay, how was that?

I made a blurty a while ago, and used it frequently. Then for some stupid reason they suspended me for not being 18 or something gay like that. Dumbasses! Ashley is gone.. She went to her grandma's. I'm rather sad. The only girl I could ever relate to of obvious reasons in which very few people would understand, has left me. Although her recent absence has made me realize my current friend situation. Due to lack of involvement, the dorks and Justin have become my main group of friends. Justin is my emotional companion while the other kids (Nick, Ryan, Jake, Vaniel.. ect) are my conversational/entertainment comepanions. I have had some of the most indepth conversations with Nick and Justin. Not stupid "why are we alive" shit I usually ponder on. I like it. I don't have to worry about gossip because they are all beyond that. That makes me happy. And Justin is the best friend I could ever ask for. Last night we were laying on his bed reading some game magazine... talking about Paper Mario and things.. And it's instances such as those that I realize how it's not just a romantic relationship, but how it's a friendship. Or when we argue about the legality of fireworks and BV's. I'm in a good place mentally right now. The anti-schoolage will give me a break from those few I just don't feel safe with.

I have a stomach ulcer and some TMJ-age which I am getting corrected tomorrow morning with a tube in the stomache and a bite plate in the mouth. It will take a month or two to work.. But that's better than being on painkillers all the time and not being able to sleep. All the sleeping pills seem to do is make me feel extremely heavy and lazy. You would think that would induce sleep...but no, it doesn't.

This time last year my friends were Pawn, Eden, and Sara. That's no longer the case by 2/3. Sara and Eden are good friends, but both of them have faded from my life. No hate involved. Pawn and I are still really close and she too is in the summer show. She is Egnea. She's got a huge long speech..(yay pawn!)

My grampa is in the hospitol.. He isn't going to live much longer. And my mom is on radiation pills and she too is going to the hospitol soon... I would really miss her if something happened. Dad said it could, but possibly won't. I'm hopeing for the best, preparing for the worst. Excuse my edgy nature, kids.

Justin is still dealing with his depression...But I sorta feel down myself lately. I don't know...I hope I don't make him worse. That would be bad. Robo Randy is giving him alot of trouble. Tyler can't ever practice and Nate just doesn't show up.. *sigh*.. The show is like next week. I hope we can do it.

Well I don't know what else to say, so I'm off. I promise more updates. Yay for updates. Later.

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