Mood: Lazy.

Amy Prueitt
to duckys
More options 11:34 am (0 minutes ago)
Kinda sounds like my relationship with Justin. The comfort is there, and the knowledge that if we're down and out in a long time, we will by some unknown force be brought together.

At least.. I think. He tells me. I honestly don't know if he keeps me around because he has feelings for me, or if he just doesn't want to risk dying alone. My need to have him around is hope, regret, and being afraid of the dark. Hope, that maybe he will want to have a future with me later. Regret that I could be out finding someone who wants a future with me later. And the third.. Well, I am always convinced someone is going to sneak in my room and torture me after killing everyone in the house, and I would be the only one left..Mortally wounded and with no one left. Having someone around eases that fear.

I could never have a relationship with someone where the feelings existed on both sides without the line being drawn. Whether they meant it to hurt or not in leaving me for another mate without so much as a question of approvale... Just something I don't want to mess with. I'm sorry she hurt you, but you're still young and a great person. I'm not sure if meeting you on the internet has made talking to you easier, or harder. But I don't speak openly to many people. How much that is saying is for your judgement, but always remember I hold you in a high place on my "List of Notstupid People". You're number 1, I believe. Followed by my friend in England, Jeremy. He and I had some adventures despite the seven year age difference. Number three isn't there yet.

I'm very much disliking the big guild thing. It's like Unity, but worse. Despite Druid places being open, and healers being needed.. I am rejected from raids for level and Newbieness. While I know my healing well, as I had been level 58 for 2 months, I am still given the "STFU n00b. Go run Deadmines." when signing up for a raid. Eitherway.. Onyxia Thursday night..at I believe 7 server time. I will be 60, and I have already requested to Gertrax that you fill a rogue place.

Today I am going to some street fair bullshit event with my Mom. She has surgery in 10 days. I'm really scared... I don't know what I'll do if she were to die... But aside from the gloom, I fixed up a nice computer to hold me while I am staying at their house for the few days following her surgery. Only 512gb RAM..but I GUESS I can handle playing WoW on that. Maybe I will take a stick out of my computer.. Hmm.. Oh the options.

I always want to write you huge big long emails so you know how much I enjoy talking to you. But for somereason, I can never convey every thought I had during the night, or in reply to what you wrote, onto e-paper. Shit, I haven't even updated my blog in a week. Not that there is any importance there. I locked it so no one could read it.

I hope rest finds you soon.. And not just sleep, the good kind. With happy dreams and waking up feeling restored. Kinda like Healing Touch Rank 9. **cough** LOSER **cough**

Zar'roc est du welden varde Vrgana gata.

<3
Amy

E-mail to Shake. I am lazy in updating. I felt like I needed to record this week somehow..

I didn't include anything about the rocking, or how I got angry and became razor happy with my hair. I also didn't include how confused I am in my search for a mate. So ying-yang on that subject. Maybe I will update at my parent's, where I am off to now.

Street fair. Sara rejected my offer to hang out. We do every year for the past 8. Not now. /sigh. Can't remake old friendships.

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